Posts Tagged ‘society’

this was my comment on premarital sex and virginity on voices of youth page (i have made slight alteration)


virginity before marriage is insisted keeping in mind the gulliblity of the young and the immature. in the name of progressiveness many young people throw all care and responsibility to the wind and have casual sex thinking that they would very soon marry each other and hence it is ok to sleep together. but how many promises are kept after the act??? and how many hearts broken after the act? how many abortions underwent? and how many cases of depression seeking psychiatrist’s help? and how many completed or attempted cases of suicides after the act because promises could not be kept up and the young girl is unable to face the society?

so in order to reduce such incidents, in the interest of the youth, it is safe to have sex within the institution of marriage. and some young people are of the opinion that sex is a very important aspect of marriage and hence the need to find out the compatibility factor before one marries. like all other compatibility factors, sexual compatibility in a marriage also needs understanding, cooperation and patience. it can be more pleasurable when done under the secure relationship of a marriage than under an insecure relationship. outside of marriage, it is more an impulsive act that can lead to many regrets later on.

hence, youth, think hundred times before you act and be aware of the consequences and your responsibilities. and be sensitive to your partner’s emotions when she refuses to give in to your request for sex.

Read Full Post »

this was my comment on an article in voices of youth page. i give a link here:
http://www.unicef.org/voy/discussions/showthread.php?p=49839#post49839lets ask why marital rape first of all occurs in india? in india, except for the few urban couple, marriage takes place betwen two individuals who have hardly met. elders would have arranged it keeping in mind, not the two individuals, but the two families. so compatibility between the social and economic aspects of the two families are looked into but the compatibility of the personality factors of the two individuals is totally ignored. added to this is the taboo placed on the topic of sex and hence many young people know nothing about the sensibilities of sex. men would be waiting for marriage, not for the life partner that they are going to get, but for the sex object that they would be gifted with, with whom they can play as they wish and can dominate over, as their own elderly men folk have done since times immemorial. he least acknowledges her as an individual with her own rights. and the girl is advised by the elders to cooperate and adjust and not to raise any objections, whatsoever, about the husband or his family. she is even sent to her marital home with the threat that she would not be welcome back home under any circumstances and she has now become the ‘property’ of the husband’s family!

under the above circumstances, what better condition can prevail except marital rape day in and day out?! the need of the hour is education – educating the couple to be married about their conjugal rights and responsibilities. and education of the girl child. but this kind of pre-marital counselling is a distant dream in india with a population of over a billion, most of them from rural background.but the first step is always the crucial one and it has to be taken now. our judicial system needs to be overhauled. who will bell the cat? ofcourse, there are many women’s organizations that are voicing their opinions and i am sure the voices will soon be heard and measures taken.

Read Full Post »

Children to follow footsteps of parents?!

While reading a post on “Rambling with Bellur” Blog (link provided on my page), i had made a comment on why people want sons and daughters to be like their parents. i am posting a part of that comment here.

the very title A son need not be like his father made me wonder why we are all so bent upon finding the parent in the child always. Why do we expect the son to be like father and the daughter to be like mother?! Why do we not allow the son to be the son himself and daughter to be the daughter herself?? At one point we all say ‘variety is the spice of life’ and at other times we do not want to see variety but expect everybody to conform to certain ‘standards’ that society has defined. Anybody not conforming to these standards are shunned and not accepted easily. Instead, if we find variations why not we celebrate the differences?

Perhaps this is due to the fact that we all desire immortality in some way or the other. If a doctor’s son/daughter becomes a doctor, the father feels a pride in perpetuating his profession through his son/daughter thus preserving himself through his profession to posterity, amounting to a degree of immortality. He is going to outlive himself through his child! Same may be the reason why people hanker after constructing houses or hoarding jewellery. When their children live in those houses after them, they would still continue to live through those houses or when the daughter wears a mother’s jewellery, mother’s memories are kept intact thus immortalizing the person!

When this is the state we are in, we can imagine how difficult it is to de-identify oneself from this body-mind-intellect complex – as directed in our spiritual texts !

Read Full Post »